My libido’s gone AWOL. Help!

Tamra MerciecaBlogs, Sexual Health6 Comments

Having a hot little libido isn’t about eating Oysters all day and feeding your partner chocolate coated strawberries while drinking red wine and watching porn!

If you’re serious about reigniting your libido, then you need to understand one simple truth…

A loss of libido = stagnant sexual energy.

It’s that simple!

In order to get your libido rockin’ you need to get your sexual energy moving.

Given that the ‘breath’ is one of the best vehicles for transporting sexual energy around the body, you want to make sure you’re breathing well.

And when I say ‘well’ I mean breathing deep enough to fully oxygenate your body.

As you’ll read in my blog ‘Healthier living could be one big breath away’ I explain how most people only breathe deep enough to survive.

They’re not actually taking in enough air to properly nourish the body.

To energise the body!

If you’re not energised, your libido won’t be going gang-busters either!

So the first thing you need to do is give your libido some air.

And BIG doses of it.

Focus on your breathing, and take time out regularly during your day to breathe deep into your genitals.

Our life force energy and our sexual energy are one and the same thing.

So feeling energised – which can only happen through adequate supplies of oxygen – will also awaken your sexual energy.

Step 2: Get moving!

You know how energised and alive you feel if you do regular activity compared to how lethargic and tired you might feel if you slouch about on the coach all day, yeah?

Well our sexual energy works in much the same way.

If you spend just one hour sitting per day, chances are you’ll have a tight groin.

And if you have a tight groin, then the sexual energy won’t be able to move beyond the genital region and will become stagnant.

And we all know what stagnant energy equals…. A libido that’s so tired, all it wants to do is sleep.


We don’t want to put our libido to sleep now do we peeps?

In order to wake up that sexual energy, get it moving freely around the body, you need to get your pelvic region moving.

Iron out any tension and tightness in the groin and pelvic region.

Your groin – which is the crease that joins the leg onto the body – doesn’t usually get much attention, so spend 5-10 minutes massaging it daily until you feel that area start to loosen.

Doing hip swivels – really BIG ones – is also great in helping to get that pelvic region active, so your sexual energy can be felt again.

What’s important when you do those hip swivels, is to make sure you’re really present to the sensations in your body.

Make the hip swivels really big, but really slow.

Don’t go any faster than you’re able to track the sensations in the body.

Do some figure eights, and then have a really good booty shake.

We all like a good booty shake!

If you spend ten minutes every day moving your pelvic region in this way, ten minutes massaging your groin, and ten minutes breathing deeply into your genitals, within a couple of weeks your libido will start to make a comeback.

… And you’ll just feel better in general!

But ladies, I’m also going suggest a couple of other great libido boosters for YOU!

Breast massage and the Jade Egg practice.

The kidney meridian – which is responsible for a woman’s sexual arousal – runs through the breasts.

That’s why when you spend time massaging your breasts, you not only re-sensitise your beast tissue so you can feel more pleasure, it actually helps you get horny!

Win win all round!

And the Jade Egg practice…. What is there not to love about the Jade Egg?

In a nutshell the Jade Egg helps a woman reconnect with her innate sexual energy, awakens the vaginal tissue so she can feel more pleasure, and super-charges her luscious libido!

You can read more about using a Jade Egg here.

Whatever you do, don’t believe the common myth that men have a higher libido than women.

Women have been conditioned to think this.

Girls under 6 are shamed and punished and restricted regarding their sexuality, more so than little boys.

So women are generally less sexually driven.

They may not be consciously aware of this, but if this is part of their conditioning, it will be felt in the body by way of a low libido.

Yet that doesn’t mean you can’t reawaken your libido!

Accessing your sexual energy isn’t necessarily something you need to learn how to do.

It’s more about unlearning everything we have been taught to do (or not to do).

It’s about opening up to your truest nature and inviting your sexual energy to be felt.

Ok, over to you.

I’ve given you the lowdown on your libido, now it’s up to YOU to spend some time getting your sassy self firing on all cylinders.

Leave a comment below on what you discover.

And if you’d like to go deeper into your sexual self, I share all in my Sexual Self 2-month online course.

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6 Comments on “My libido’s gone AWOL. Help!”

  1. Hey there Tamra, I love reading your articles…..always so informative, Thankyou.
    I do have a question though regarding Male Libido after reading the your article on awakening the female libido.
    Is there anything else that us males can do to awaken and definitely increase our libidos other than what’s in the above article…….as my libido seems to be almost not there, single at the moment, however I would really love to start feeling my libido again and really embrace it as I would like to have another relationship.
    Thanks Tamra and have a brilliant week.
    Pete Kennedy

    1. Hi Pete. So glad you enjoy my articles! Essentially the breathing and the pelvic movement that I discuss in the article is just as applicable to men in increasing libido. There are also a range of penis exercises and massage techniques that I teach the men in the Sexual Self course I run. I share one of those exercises in the video of one of the talks presented at Sexpo Perth this year. You can watch the video here: Simply scroll down the page a bit. While you do certainly want to be physically clearing out the blocks that are creating the loss of libido, you do also want to be clearing out the emotional blocks – as everything we experience in our body is simply a manifestation of our mental programming. And once you clear the mental programming, then the body heals naturally. I ran a workshop explaining this in more detail a few months ago. So if you want to have a listen, check it out here: Hope that helps. Tamra x

  2. I’m stuck at a desk all day but have recently started to go to the gym it’s that time of year 🙂

    Since going I’ve found my libido has increased, probably due to the exercise but I do concentrate on breathing with deep breaths to try and oxygenate my blood so maybe that’s the cause too – great tip.

    I’m also going to try kegel exercises whiel at work to see if that helps – what do you think?

    1. Hi Cheryl. Have you tried the Jade Egg practice? The reason I ask, is because the Jade Egg is your one-stop shop for libido, increasing pleasure, keeping the sexual organs tight and resilient along with a raft of other positive effects. You can learn more here: As you’ll read, Kegals only help in keeping the area active, they don’t actually tone the area, as you need resistance for vaginal tone, and holding the Jade Egg inside gives you that tone. Hope that helps.

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