Step 5: Release attachment to the outcome….
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So you’ve got clear on what you want you want in a partner, you’re dating yourself (and LOVING it), you’ve starting to release your gunk or limiting beliefs (with a therapist or are being taught the skills to do it yourself), you’re putting yourself out there in the appropriate environment to meet someone; what’s next? This is where you detach from the outcome or goal of meeting your perfect partner.
Detach you ask? That’s crazy. Well not really. Attachment can be likened to an addiction. It is a needfor something in order to make us feel happy and fulfilled. Now we should never need anything to feel a certain way. You see, the problem with attachments are, they hold us back. They stop the flow of that thing coming into our life or into existence. Attachments are like anchors that stop the ship moving forward.
When you remove attachment, you allow whatever it was you were working towards, in. Have you ever been in a relationship where the other person is so attached to you, so needy, that all you want to do is run? You feel suffocated, right? Well this is the energy you’re putting out to the people you meet, if you’re attached to needing a mate.
Now there is often a fear that if we detach, we won’t get what we’re after. This is not true. You’ve placed your order, you’re taking all the necessary action steps required to bring in that relationship, now it’s time to continue enjoying living life. If you struggle to detach, you need to go deep and ask yourself: ‘Why am I really attached to having a partner?’ Once you have that clarity you can start giving all those things to yourself, so when a partner does come, they are not fulfilling a need, they are more like an added bonus; someone to celebrate your already complete life with!
Task: Grab a notepad and write down your needs and then ways you can fulfil those yourself, and think outside the box. If it’s a sexual need, how can you fulfil that need yourself? Maybe it’s a need for security. Whatever need it is, write it down and brainstorm a list of ways you can give that to yourself.
If you’d like to learn how to remove your own limiting beliefs and a specific process for unattaching (so you can create the space needed for your Prince or Princess to arrive) then enrol in our 9-week Remarkable Relationships tele course where you’ll be given the magic formula for bringing more love into your life. Type in the code word ‘GIFT’ and you’ll receive 20% off!