Sexual shame: Are you a victim?

Tamra MerciecaSexual Health0 Comments

Do you deny, suppress or judge your sexual desires?

Do you contract or feel pain, shame or guilt during or after sex?

If you do, you’re not alone.

It is a statistical fact that little girls are restricted, shamed, punished and made to feel guilty about their body and what they do with it.

What does this breed?

Nations of people who secretly love sex, while at the same time shame it.

No doubt you’ve heard such derogatory comments as: ‘Good girls keep their legs shut’, ‘Women who love sex are whores’ or ‘Sex is dirty or sinful or wrong or immoral’.

This mental abuse seeps into our subconscious and poisons our relationship with sex.

It creates this feeling of sexual shame that is difficult to shake.

As a result, women who take on this sexual shame turn down, withhold or suppress their sexual expression.

Either that, or they use sex as a ‘currency’ to get what they want and to try and feel better about themselves.

Due to the neediness of such an act, this rarely cures them of the shame, guilt and self-loathing they might feel.

They end up being starved of pleasure and joy because they’re taught to feel guilt and shame for wanting to feel good.

It’s quite the oxymoron.

If we look at children, there is this unwritten rule that children should not see, feel or know about sex, despite them being born of it.

We see this play out when an unexpected sex scene comes on in the family home while the kids are still playing.

While the parents may not say anything out loud, you can feel them contract.

Kids being so perceptive pick up on that energy – that unconscious contraction – and then hold onto it, so that when later in life they do start to become sexual, their automatic response is to contract.

Contracting shuts down the sexual energy, numbing the vaginal canal in women and causing erectile dysfunction in men.

Why do I share this with you?

Because you do not have to experience sexual shame.

There really is no place for shame and guilt in sex.

The shame, guilt and denial of such an important part of ourselves is unhealthy and can lead to all sorts of physical and emotional sicknesses.

If you suffer from sexual shame, know that you can clear out the conditioning so you can enjoy a healthy relationship with sex.

If you’d like to learn more about how our childhood conditioning affects our sex life, sign up for the free Self-Love Starter’s Kit at the top of the page and I’ll send you a 1-hour audio lesson explaining this is far more depth.

And if you want to see me in person, I’ll be sharing all this and so much more during my talk ‘Let Sex Be Thy Medicine’ at this year’s Conscious Sexuality Camp happening in Warburton from the 13th-15th Feb.

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